Violence amoung teens and my theory of a link to Parenting

I've been watching the news and there are many disturbing things going on in the world, and the most disturbing to me as a parent is that just this week there was a school shooting, and 2 people killed by teens because "they were bored".  America what's going on here??

Last week I was watching The movie Parenthood and found this quote and it really hit home with me not only because of my own past and experience with parents but even more so because of the news a couple weeks ago. 

How is it that everything requires a license but 2 people can make a baby?  I'm not saying that the government should step in and require license to pro-create because well then I wouldn't be here today and that would be way to intrusive into the lives of the people.  The quote does make you think about it though.  For me, I've always found it odd that the Judge/State or whoever made the ruling thought that the people who raised Rick should be given 2 more kids to raise.  I think it was only because Gen and Jim were well off.  I do have to say I learned how to work hard being there and sure enough I was raised with manners. 

It disturbs me to see in the news how teens are committing such violent crimes.  When two kids shot a man in the back simply because "they were bored" everyone was talking about how the problem was that the kids had a gun.  No, the problem isn't a gun problem...the gun was just the way in which the crime was carried out.  I do believe kids shouldn't have guns unless accompanied by an adult.  Why is it that:
 
But this isn't even about gun rights.  Because the same week there were two teens who beat a WW2 vet with a flash light who latter died at a hospital, those teens killed a man just the same as the others without a gun.  Actually I think the crime without the gun was more brutal. 

Then came the talk about race.  Really?  I thought that we had realized 50 years ago that people are the same, that race doesn't matter it's just different amounts of pigment in the skin.  Race doesn't make one person more apt to commit a crime than another. 

The problem isn't guns, or race; the problem is that young people are killing others.  That they are out getting into trouble.  This is a parenting problem...  Where were these kids parents?  Why did these kids have a gun?  Why were the kids out thinking about killing or hurting people? 

The school shooting that happened at in Georgia the bookkeeper who helped the troubled young adult to surrender said in one interview that I watched that the shooter told her that no one loved him and that's why he was doing this.


This is the problem.  We're not valuing our children enough.  They are only little for so long then they grow.  We are living in a nation and economy where both parents have to work in order to keep a roof over head and food on the table.  This needs to change.  Parents need to be with their kids, Children need to know they are loved. 

We are living in a world where we're raising our children in fear.  We crush their hopes and dreams.  Then they are also home alone.  Then there are the parents who are abusive, drunk, and into drugs.  As a parent it's our job to set a good example of life.  As a teacher we need to educate our children in what they need to have a bright future. 


The other day I was out hiking with my family and my oldest daughter stopped to look at moss and I was telling her that it's moss and she can study botany in school (the study of plants) or she can study zoology and become a vet.  My husband looked at me and said "stop planning her life she has a long way to go before she knows what she wants to be" to which my daughter replied "yeah, Mom, I'm only 4!"  Yes, but it's my strong belief that if we tell our children that they can be ANYTHING that they want to be and once they have a dream and passion in one direction to harness it and help them along that they will believe in themselves and go after their goals.  I think that if there was more of this then there wouldn't be so many teen pregnancies, bored and lost teens out getting in trouble. 

I say this from my own experience...
My grandparents told me when I was in high school and had a dream of becoming a teacher that I was too stupid to be a teacher and should take nursing classes (even though I disliked hospitals) and then when I wanted to study horses and go to Cornell University and figure out what with horses I wanted to do they crushed that dream telling me that I didn't know enough and that there's no money in horses.  Gen and Jim really crushed all my dreams and I had very little self-esteem all through school.  I'm lucky that I had teachers and other supporters who told me that they believed in me and thought I'd go far in life.  I do feel like I've let them down that I haven't gone that far or accomplished much at all.  But I haven't stopped trying.  I keep making new goals and one day I'll succeed at something.  


Since my thoughts were a bit all over the place...let me conclude by summing up my thoughts for you.  The world today seems a sad and hostile place and with all the violence our children are facing at such young ages and then growing to commit murders we need to change this for the future generations.  We need to change this world that we're living in and make it a brighter place for all.  In order to make this change we need to offer classes about parenting and give parents more options to learn how to deal with problems that arise (trust me I'm far from perfect and can use some too), we need to raise the minimum wage so that parents aren't spending all their time working and have more quality time with their children, we need to make sure that kids know that they are loved and to support their dreams.  And for the people that have guns in their home they need their children to know that guns are dangerous and not to be touched without an adult and parents for crying out loud lock your guns up so that they aren't easy access to children!!  I think if we do this and teach and show children how to love and to have a respect for one another that the world as a whole will be a more peaceful and happy place.


I'll leave you with some more great photo/quotes relating to children, parenting and a brighter future: